Have you ever felt the color of your skin?

I mean really feel your skin color?

I am not talking about being comfortable in your own skin. But, actually feeling your color, but there is no mirror around. Not, that it hasn’t happened to me before. It has. It’s just been such a long time, that I took it all for granted.

When you are a Black woman driving through the cow country, especially when some parts feels a bit “dicey”… well, it gets a little scary! But, don’t worry I put my “game face” on and was up for the challenge!

When I finally had to stop for gas, I felt all eyes were upon us. This one man even over- spilled his gasoline on his car, cause he was too busy looking at me! I caught a look at myself in the mirror. I didn’t see anything wrong. I had my head tied up in the front. To me I thought I looked like Christina Aguilera or even Amy Winehouse, alb eight a wider version, but still stylish! To him, I probably looked more like Aunt Jemima! And anyways, what’s wrong with Mammy? I love the movie “Gone with the Wind”! I actually think that it should be renamed, “Along Comes Mammy” because she stole the show! However, the way this man looked and acted, I expected to see a “Colored Only” sign on the washroom door. But, it is what it is.

But, who cares!!! Possums, I was going home!

I was going home… and be put in jail, for sneaking in bacon.

How much bacon? Possums, what happen to the good old days when people gave other people going-away gifts of bottles of wine and the such? Not, ma famile! Ma famile gave me a large load of bacon…about six pounds of the stuff! So, not only did I have to worry about getting home safe, I had to also worry about getting caught with all that bacon!

As I was nearing the border, I was getting antsy. Ava could feel it cause I kept on asking her how many kilometers we still had left….every five minutes! I can’t believe I was so nervous over meat! Possums, not even when I am about to do it, do I get this nervous. And it is almost the same thing! But, what’s to worry? I am a Canadian citizen. I was born here. Surely, they can’t have me arrested for carrying bacon across the border! Could they? I have seen many a people wear many a strange and ugly things walking the streets of Toronto, all committing fashion crimes, and they never got arrested… and they should have!

“Citizenship?”

“Canadian.”

“How much money, did you spend?”

“About…$300. Philly never had as many deals as they usually have and then I never got a chance to go to the Galleria mall, cause I know I would have gotten some serious deals there. But, Ava wasn’t up to it. Ava, say “hi” to the nice man. And then, I was going to pick up two more jackets for myself, but Ava reminded me that I never wear that many jackets. Cause, to tell you the truth, Officer, I don’t like wearing that much clothes. Hell, I only wear underwear on the days that I am obligated to. So, I just ended up buying the pink jacket, cause it looked so Rhianna-like. Do you know, Rihanna?”

“Can’t say that I do. Anything, do declare?”

“Well, Rhianna, is known for her real fash-“

“Okay, M’am. Can you pop open your trunk for me?”

My heart sank.

I knew I should have insisted that Dante put all that bacon in his pants. But, he wouldn’t do it cause it was too cold! Wuss! And Ava wouldn’t let him, cause she said that it wouldn’t be very convincing if a little boy had this enormous bulge in the front of his pants.

“But, he’s BLACK,” I argued!!!

“M’am, can I ask you a question?” ask the officer as he leaned into my car window.

“Yes, sir?”

“Why, is there a lot of bacon wrapped up in tin foil?”

I had to do something!!! The man in black was going to take away my bacon! All those juicy breakfasts in bed that I was going to get Ava to make and serve to me was slowly disappearing. Yeah, right! Like, hell she was going to make me all those breakfasts! But, one could always hope!

Then I thought to myself…well, I just couldn’t. Could, I? Surely, you jest?

I can’t even tell you, but I played the card.

I played the C card.

“Well, it’s Cancer.”

“Excuse, me?” he asked.

“My Aunt’s got Cancer and I just couldn’t say no to her, when she gave me all this bacon. It was her last wish for me.”

“Her last wish, eh?”

“Yes…on her deathbed. She whispered in my ear that she wanted me to have all the bacon in her freezer that she so lovingly picked out at the grocery store, on one of her good days. She knew that it was my favorite.”

The man in black looked at me.

I looked at him.

He looked at Dante.

And Dante sniffed.

Possums, I got me my bacon!!!! Never had I ever had to work so hard for a piece of meat!

Well….that’s debatable.

Will I ever drive down to Philly again? Hell to the Nah!

Next, time I will take a plane!

First class.

For the warm nuts.

But, of course!

All Contents Copyright 2008-2010. lucresialinton.com All Rights Reserved. Visit my two love sites like no other-Adonisunited.com-where gods and goddesses reign supreme and Jazznymph.com -where Jazz Lovers Come To Play